Do you want another rap?

Grandmaster rap himself

Yes Sevo.  Unlike the song my response would be a very firm, “No. Never”. For those of you outside of Uganda I’m talking about Museveni’s 2010 debut rap release. I’ve mentioned it before on this blog but now things have taken a dramatic turn for the worse as this frankly embarrassing foray into the music industry has been named Best Single of the year. I dislike the song for many reasons, not leastly because it’s a bit like your dad reading a list of things he likes: cricket, Sunday newspapers, ham sandwiches, ordinate survey maps, slightly faster than usual and with a beat behind it and then trying to get your friends to dance to it. Each time I hear the song my toes curl a little and I just find myself a bit embarrassed for this 60 something man who has put himself in league with the likes of 50 cent and Eminem.

Weirdly though the youth here seem to quite like it. I just simply cannot imagine David Cameron releasing a song, rap or otherwise, that would be considered anything close to cool by the youth, or indeed anyone for that matter. There is certainly no way that whilst out on a Saturday night you would hear it in the clubs. Yet this is what happened to me the other week, there I was dancing away to the usual musical fare when over the PA came “do you want annazza rap?” Well as clearly expressed above, no I do not. I don’t want party politics to be brought into the enjoyment of my Saturday night either. Earlier in the day there had been an NRM (Museveni’s political party) rally and several people in the club were adorned in bright yellow t-shirts and bandanas with the president’s face on. When his song came on I thought the excitement might actually induce heart attacks as NRM supporters set about leaping everywhere and screaming “YES SEVO!” at the top of their lungs. In my opinion there is a time and place for party politics and it is not at 1am on a Saturday night whilst I’m trying to enjoy a cheeky gin and bitter lemon.

Finally, I’m pretty sure I’m not the only one in thinking that politicians should have better things with which to fill their time. Rather than releasing dubious records best confined to bargain bins perhaps he should be concentrating on the various issues that currently affect Uganda. The radio stations don’t need another rap song to fill up their shows but Ugandans do need basic health care, universal primary and secondary education, better roads and more job opportunities.  

Yes, even here on the equator it rains

I am soon to receive a very important visitor here in Uganda. Our recent conversations regarding her pending arrival (and what clothes to bring) have made me realise that it’s probably time for a little bit of preconception-busting, I won’t say myth-busting as weather isn’t entirely mythical is it?

Firstly, despite the fact that Uganda is a sub-Saharan country and straddles the equator, it rains here… a lot. In the northern and central regions admittedly it rains less and is several degrees warmer on average than down here in the south, but still, regardless of where you are going in Uganda a rain coat is advisable.

The plus side to all this rain is that Uganda is incredibly green and not the arid landscape that many people envisage. Rainforests alive with monkey chatter, open meadows, terraced hillsides, beaches, even snow capped mountains, perhaps not what you imagine when you think of a land locked country in sub Saharan Africa and yet Uganda has them all.

Secondly, it gets cold here sometimes. Kabale is pretty infamous amongst Ugandans for being chilly. Those living in Kampala look taken aback when I say I live near Lake Bunyonyi. “It’s so cold there, I surely can’t survive” and other such statements are common. This makes it sound like the Arctic which I can assure you it is not. Firstly there are considerably less polar bears, Eskimos and igloos and you’re more likely to find people pothole fishing that ice fishing. 

Yes, the mornings are foggy, one of the occupational hazards of living roughly 2000m above sea level. But in truth it’s still a lot hotter than my native Britain and whilst it does rain frequently the storms are generally short lived and there’s also a lot of equatorial sun to be had.

So, packing advice for my important visitor or any one else to Uganda? Bring layers. This way you are well equipped for warmer days as well as colder days and nights. A waterproof coat is pretty much essential as are (and I feel like an old school matron saying this) some sensible shoes, after all dusty road + rain = quagmire, and flip flops, heels, suede are not going to fare well. Oh, and although non-weather related, a wind up torch is a jolly good idea after all it's taken me 4 days to post this blog due to power black outs!

Turn over a new leaf ? Not today, thank you

Just ready for the turning...

So Christmas and its excesses have come and gone and many of us are left wondering what now? Lots of us will start the new year with a renewed sense of vigour, a determination to turn over a new leaf. We will see this as an opportunity to shed our old skin and emerge thinner, happier, less vice-driven butterflies. Whilst this is lovely in theory the reality is that January is a terrible time to try and make a change.

As everyone knows January is one of the, if not the most, miserable month. It’s cold, dreary, only the rubbish chocolates are left in the tin, you’re worn out from the niceties of the season and you’re sick and tired of the taste of antacid. The house looks bare because you’ve now taken down the lights and decorations that made it look pretty and by now you’ve probably thrown away or recycled all those cards sending little scraps of love to you. So what does that leave you with? Guilt of over eating, poor chocolate selection, a feeling of emptiness, a sense of nothing to look forward to. Do you really want to add to all this a task that frankly is going to make you even more miserable? What happens come the 15^th, or 23^rd or even the 28^th January when your resolve slips and boom – add to your current cacophony of negative emotions: failure.

That’s not to say that you definitely will fail. But generally if you’re not ready to make a change and you’re actually just doing it because well “it’s the done thing”, it’s probably not the best idea you’ve ever had.  I know that people will say new year, new start. Yes ok there’s logic in that, but there are 364 other days of the year in which your new year can begin, let’s not get too caught up in the Gregorian calendar now.

If, despite my arguments for why this isn’t the best time to make a change, you are still intent on making one, well done. Your determination has managed to overcome the first hurdle: opposition. The rest of you, don’t worry, see above as to why now isn’t the right time for you to turn over that new leaf after all. But what will your resolutions be? One year a friend decided on several resolutions one of which was to be more selfish, well each to their own!

Why not try something small this year, but something that will make a big impact? Make a resolution to help out at a local community centre or homeless shelter for a couple of hours a week. If you have commitments at home no problem, you could become a UN online volunteer. If volunteering doesn't seem like your kind of thing, fundraising is an excellent way to support causes you feel strongly about. Not only do you get to raise money for a worthy cause but you can also combine it with your hobbies - running, cycling, swimming or do something dare-devil that you mightn't have tried before - sky diving, bungee jumping, swimming with sharks. Or if you don't fancy breaking a sweat/ inducing a heart attack you could sponsor a child to ensure that they get a basic education, a clean water project or pledge to give x amount to charity each month.

Maybe this new year your resolution won't just be about improving your life but also helping to better someone else's too, perhaps even saving it. Surely that's much better than laying of the choccie biscuits for a while?